Hardnock life…

My cousin wasn’t very truthful to me. It’s been a minute since I’ve seen the lil tike… well, he’s not so little now, as he’ll turn 15 later this month. When I saw him Saturday afternoon, he seemed a bit off. I could see some of the characteristics in him that I doubt would ever go away – like his shyness, his laughter, the little facial expressions that he gives when someone says something stupid. But he seemed a bit empty. My sis and I asked him how he was doing in school, and he said fine. He’s taking summer school classes, which he doesn’t like, but he said he was ok. We talked for about an hour and a half, then I had to head home to work on a paper. He told us he had a MySpace page and that he would link us. When I got home, I searched for him and linked him up. The two fat studs in his ears, the baggy shirt and pants that he was wearing earlier should have been a whimper to me that something was up, as his page was a blood curdling scream. I’m not gonna go into to details about it, but I can say that the image that my lil cuzzo is trying to portray is not him. It will never be him. My cousin is co-opting a lifestyle that will reject him like a lactose intolerant person rejects dairy. After going through his site, I wanted to go back to his place, grab him square on the shoulders and shake the shit out of him. But what would that do? How could that help? My sis, my mom, and I have decided to have him over next week to talk to him. To see where his head is at. It sucks that it will take his distant cousins to take an interest in his world, to help get him back on track before it’s too late… which is one of my biggest fears. Why anyone would want to front like a thug is beyond me. The end result is either being hurt or killed by someone that looks like you, or the boys in blue… a sick cycle that plays itself over and over again. There are some people that are so caught up in this lifestyle, in which options for them to steer on a better path is limited. I’ve known kids that have been on their own since they were 12 or 13, and have been doing all that they can to survive. My cousin doesn’t have the thick skin and techniques to handle all that. I hope that all this is a dumb phase that will pass. I wish that his folks would be a bit more observant to what their son is stepping his foot into. Like him, there are other kids out there screaming like hell for help – I just wish that folks would get the cotton balls out of their ears and take the blindfolds off of their eyes and pay attention.